"One size does not fit all as we are all one of a kind"
Neurodiversity describes the idea that people experience and interact with the world around them in many different ways; there is no one "right" way of thinking, learning, and behaving, and differences are not viewed as deficits.
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In 2023, I premiered my first ever original production at the Attic Studio Theatre in Toronto. The idea for Yours Truly, came to me during 2020, which was in my graduating year of university and also during the year when the COVID-19 pandemic forced us all into quarantine. Adjusting to a new life without human interaction was such a challenge for us artists as our field revolves around human interaction as a generator for creative physical expression, and being confined to a screen provided so many limitations and learning struggles for building an education in a field that only knows an in-person experience. For me, being in quarantine provided me a lot of opportunities to make the most of the time I had with myself and loved ones within my COVID bubble as we didn't have the choice to commit to our in-person obligations at school, work, and rehearsals. But being an artist, the creative brain never rests.
Living with a learning disability, my pathway to a successful education has never been easy being that I severely struggled with subjects in school that had no alternate methods to my specific learning style that required extra class time, extensions on assignments, and personal one-on-one teaching sessions outside of class. When we were forced into quarantine in 2020, all of these resources that were essential for a fair education for me were put on hold. The tools I needed to succeed were taken from me as everyone had to adjust to a new school life online. Spending time in quarantine and not having the same access to accommodations for my education made me realize how much our world defaults to a limited social and educational framework. Families are forced to invest thousands of dollars into Individual Education Plans in order for students to have a fair chance at an education. Social, professional, and educational environments are structured with a Neurotypical focal point that the Neurodivergent community is influenced to follow abandoning one's own way of learning and thinking. Reflecting on all these concepts is what inspired me to write my first ever biographical play, Yours Truly,.
"Yours Truly, is an original movement piece by Heidi Nickel that centers around a young woman with a learning disability navigating the obstacles of school, relationships, and adulthood in the best way she knows how: dance. Using dance as her voice, she paints her perspective of the world as a Neurodivergent individual living in a Neurotypical society. Yours Truly, takes us on a heartwarming journey of self – love, finding your voice, discovering the meaning of family, and coming to the understanding of ‘one size does not fit all as we are all one of a kind.’”
Importance of Neurodiversity
Vulnerability is a concept I have both battled and embraced throughout my entire life. Growing up, I often struggled with my speech in school and eventually found refuge in dance. I figured if I couldn't use my voice, I might as well use my body. It was an instant connection. I fell in love with moving to music and it became my foundation for pursuing the performing arts, and this piece pays homage to these roots because without dance, I wouldn't be where I am today.
Dance isn't just moving our bodies. It's our voice when words are not an option. Dance unlocks a whole new method of storytelling you can't get from words in a book. It's human nature to question whether or not we want the world to see the rawest forms of ourselves. There's a constant questioning of "what ifs." The "what if people laugh at me?" "What if I look silly?" "What if everyone stares?" "What if I mess up and everyone is watching?" and so on. These are questions I ask myself on a regular basis whether that be in the workplace, interviews, and meeting new people. But when it comes to a piece that's as personal as this one, there's no choice but to be the most truthful version of yourself, and I strive to create more work that does just that.
Being Neurodivergent in a Neurotypical world has taught me how much our voices are silenced when not aligning with pre-constructed social etiquette and being forced to into a restricted educational and professional pathway. There's a continuous lack of initiative for accommodating kids and adults living with disabilities to ensure equal rights to fair learning and securing employment. We continuously fight to prove our intellectual, social, and artistic capabilities as well as our independence. The Neurodivergent community deserves recognition and to have more pieces showcasing the talent, gifts, and important messages that need to be shared when talking about complete diversity.
I created this piece to show the audience whomever the demographic, what it's like inside one of the many minds of being in the Neurodivergent community. I want you to step inside the space and not only see the challenges of a Neurodivergent individual, but to embrace the approach of learning and communication that people such as myself have used to navigate life in a Neurotypically led society. A personal piece such as this is made from the heart and the lived experiences of the Neurodivergent community.
(Photography: Tiffany Manankil)